That’s the name of the game. Blue Eyes’ Ojai office. Done and dusted. I had fun putting it all together, and he loves it! “A compromise is an agreement where opposing sides give up some of what they want to find a solution that everyone can accept, settling a dispute through mutual concessions rather than continuing … Continue reading Compromise
survival after betrayal
12 years later…
2025 First, I will say, that living 30 years with an undiscovered and therefore unrecovered addict, and another 12 years with a recovering addict, now, in the year 2026, things aren’t bad. I guess, at this point, as the wife of a sex addict, I can say, things are good. Our marriage is fine. Nobody’s … Continue reading 12 years later…
Seeking happiness, 10 years later
Ten years ago, I wrote this post: https://trynottocryonmyrainbow.com/2015/12/08/seeking-happiness/ The post is pretty much all about The Peacemaker, our younger child, and his bout with depression. I end the post, written in December 2015, with: “On a side note, I would like to feel some literal sunshine on my face… we are drowning here in the … Continue reading Seeking happiness, 10 years later
Our own worst enemy
This meme was sent to Blue Eyes last week by his sister. The unfortunate thing about having really awful parents, sometimes the wounds are so deep, we simply cannot see that not only haven’t we dealt with the abuse and subsequent fallout, but we are in fact perpetuating the abuse, carrying it forward, and abusing … Continue reading Our own worst enemy
Signs of emotional exhaustion
Yes, to this: “80% of women don’t cry, scream, or argue when they’re hurting, they go silent. Not because they don’t care, but because they’ve already said everything they needed to say and it changed nothing. Silence is her last language. It’s what she says when she realizes her words have fallen on deaf ears … Continue reading Signs of emotional exhaustion
Explanations or excuses
Pretty beach sunset I have now heard (or seen) this term “neurodivergent” a half dozen times in the past week. Thank you AI It’s one of those phenomena where you have never heard of something before and then BAM! There it is over and over. Sometimes I think it’s just a matter of coincidence. When … Continue reading Explanations or excuses
Trust shouldn’t be a compromise
From somewhere on the internet I pretty much agree with the above and realizing hindsight is 20/20, I have to say before dday I trusted Blue Eyes with what I consider the big stuff… I trusted he would be faithful, and be there for me when I was going through a hard time, sorta, generally … Continue reading Trust shouldn’t be a compromise
Actions, not words
Strangely enough, I’m still trying to get Blue Eyes to stop taking his phone into the bathroom. It was on the boundary list all those years ago. He stopped for a long time, but has been back at it for a while. Why do people even want to have their phone in the bathroom? Beyond … Continue reading Actions, not words
You are going to be okay, part two
The sun is shining, the birds are chirping, blossoms are popping, it’s spring in Portland. I’m doing some cleaning of the closets and other such spring kinda stuff. Life is not perfect, but it’s good. Eleven years ago today, I was three months into healing from the most shocking revelation, that my husband was a … Continue reading You are going to be okay, part two
Another day, another cheater
Yesterday I visited my favorite “downtown Ojai” interiors store. I put downtown in quotes because Ojai is a very small town. Barely 8,000 residents, but it has lots going for it, like great shopping (albeit expensive), yummy restaurants, lots of fun events like the Memorial Weekend Arts Fair, a juniors tennis tournament, music festivals, two … Continue reading Another day, another cheater
try not to cry on my rainbow 