It was Sunday morning of this past holiday weekend and I was triggered by something, I don't quite remember. It wasn't so much debilitating as it was distracting. Those feelings of not knowing, of my instincts being totally off, for years. Of him telling me about Ashley, the first, how she had worked years before … Continue reading I knew it wasn’t perfect
betrayed spouse
Strong a.f.
I’m currently on a plane to San Francisco to spend a long weekend with Blue Eyes, being touristy. We’ve been to the Bay Area dozens of times, Blue Eyes was actually born just outside the city, but this time I wanted to do a couple walking tours, Chinatown and Little Italy... some history, some food, … Continue reading Strong a.f.
Don’t play that song
So that last post was maybe less ranting than it was just sad. But this post, this post is pure ranting. After one of my marathon calls last week with one of our employees, I needed to run some errands. I hopped in the car and although the day was actually sunny (but brutally cold … Continue reading Don’t play that song
Gimme that shiny thing
I had a rough week last week. Pretty sure this week is going to be filled with some ranting posts. Shall we begin? Work has been hellish lately. For quite some time I have focused on merely getting Blue Eyes through the day. I'm there for him, to talk, to discuss, to problem solve. I … Continue reading Gimme that shiny thing
I’m okay
Last week I drove to the beach house by myself. Blue Eyes and I were in a bit of a spat regarding a work issue. I had done my share, it was time for him to kick in. He promised me he would, then he didn't. It infuriated me. It was a big deal. I … Continue reading I’m okay
Love is…
I woke up this morning to my husband hugging me and telling me he loves me. The first thought that ran through my head was... he would say the same thing to any warm bodied female he happened to wake up next to, and I'm sure he has. I know he said it to the other … Continue reading Love is…
Rationalization 201
Possibly been sticking my head where it doesn't belong again, and getting my panties in a wad. For those of us who have been in long term marriages, or intimate partnerships, we know it's not all sweetness and light. It's not all romance and sexy time. In fact, it's mostly not about that at all. … Continue reading Rationalization 201
Paradise
Last month we spent nine days in Hawaii. Mostly I wanted to just relax, bask in the sunshine, walk along the beach, devour afternoon snacks by the pool. We didn't have a rental car and weren't near any actual town, just in a resort area, so we stayed put, all nine days. Paradise! Since we … Continue reading Paradise
Here’s where it gets sticky
I've written numerous times here of my support of the 12 step program for addicts, especially sex addicts. I have read numerous blog entries over the years from people whose opinion differs from mine. I get it. I have actually never been to a 12 step meeting, of any kind, so why would I think … Continue reading Here’s where it gets sticky
Speaking of amends
While I was searching around for my old post about the other woman stalking us on an airplane, I somehow came across this post regarding Blue Eyes' 8th & 9th steps and making amends. And, because Blue Eyes brought up amends in a comment on my last post (we're not together right now, I'm at … Continue reading Speaking of amends
