I hopped on the elliptical this afternoon and turned my exercise play list to shuffle mode. 'I Won't Give Up' by Jason Mraz was the first song to play. A good warm-up song for me. Actually, listening to this song has brought me through some tough moments over the past four years. It's kind of … Continue reading I won’t give up
affair discovery
“The only winning move is not to play.”
When I think back to how things used to be, with Blue Eyes, it is difficult to remove the umbrella of pain and sadness and trauma that seems to hover over those memories. If I dig deep though, I know what we had was pretty great in the scheme of things. We had a long term loving relationship. … Continue reading “The only winning move is not to play.”
Looking back, just like any other day
I am moving right past the fact that this is it, right now, as I type this, the two year anniversary of the discovery day phone call. Blue Eyes did write me a beautiful and loving thank you note acknowledging that he knows what this day represents to me and that he is grateful for everything … Continue reading Looking back, just like any other day
Looking back, part two
While glancing back through 2015 posts, something else popped out at me and that was the fact that early on I still obsessed about the sex my husband had with the other woman. And even after I fully metabolized how unimportant those sex acts were in the scheme of things, I still focused on being able … Continue reading Looking back, part two
Why her?
As in, I was asked a question the other day by a friend. Why do I focus so much energy on the last acting out partner? Why is she the one who garnered so much interest, why was she the one I spewed vitriol over, why was she the most dangerous? Versus the others. Although … Continue reading Why her?
I will not be robbed of my story
“All sorrows can be borne if you put them in a story or tell a story about them.” Isak Dinesen About six hours ago, we crossed over 15 months since I found out my husband had a decades long secret sex life. The phone call that informed me of his most recent "intermittent" eight year affair is … Continue reading I will not be robbed of my story
Should I thank the flower lady
With it being Valentine’s Day and all… I thought I would join the masses and post something related. I have another post just about ready to go with my first week’s progress on my new healthy living plan and I am feeling great about that and want to post it, but I have been ruminating … Continue reading Should I thank the flower lady
We are all in pain
If I ever thought I would run out of things to write for my blog, I was mistaken. Even if there is nothing interesting enough to write about going on in my life, other bloggers daily give me ideas of topics to write about. Every day I am either prompted by another’s blog topic, or … Continue reading We are all in pain
Another dark road, part two
Hello All. Well, this is it, January 11. I have reached the one year anniversary of discovery day. In about eight hours, it will be the exact moment one year ago today that a delusional woman called me on my mobile phone and informed me that she had been having sex with my husband for … Continue reading Another dark road, part two
Heartbroken
Journal Entry: August 14, 2014 Today is another trigger filled day. Today is the one year anniversary of the last day my husband saw Camilla. They did not have sex. He had meetings out of town in a large city three hours away by car. From the phone records, I know they had been texting … Continue reading Heartbroken
