Two years ago I asked Blue Eyes to write a letter to the other woman as part of his ninth step. For reasons that have been discussed many times on my blog the letter was not and will never be sent to the other woman. I do believe this letter catapulted my healing in a … Continue reading The letter
Disclaimer: I took two dance classes and a stretching class this past Saturday, then took two very long walks, and now my right knee is absolutely screaming at me. Exercise is critical to my continued health goals. Damn I HATE being injured and grounded. It pisses me off. So here goes... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eiDiKwbGfIY I'm not sure … Continue reading Days like this
I've done it again. I have to say this is one of the main reasons I don't follow a lot of blogs. I was reading a blog by a betrayed spouse and I looked down her 'Blogs I read' list (of course this is absolutely 100% my own fault) and noticed multiple blogs written by … Continue reading But why?
https://www.nytimes.com/2018/04/06/style/modern-love-sleeping-with-married-men-infidelity.html After one of my favorite exercise classes this morning I was in a super good mood. I picked up my mobile phone to check the weather for this afternoon and accidentally hit the News app icon with my clumsy fingers. The above Times article blasted across my screen. I read it. Of course I did. … Continue reading Rationalization 101
It seems to me that ever since I wrote the post about Control and the photo of the other woman, I have felt a weird vibe here on the old blog. First let me get this off my chest. My husband has his own path. He is a recovering sex addict. His recovery includes counseling, … Continue reading Did I forget to say how great my husband is?
For Blue Eyes, part of his addiction is clearly about control. As a child, he was under the strict and harsh command of his narcissistic and abusive mother. She belittled him and chided him and rode his ass day and night. He could never do anything right. Failure was right around the corner for him … Continue reading Control
or that I am perfect, or whatever, I'm here to set the record straight. Ha ha ha, of course I am not perfect. No one is perfect, and I am far far from it. I was doing my monthly check in, google search, etc... of my little family and for the first time in a … Continue reading Just in case you thought my life was all glamour and bliss…
I have been sick for the past few days. Not horrible sick, mainly worn down, not sleeping enough, mild fever, sinus headache that won't go away... There's a lot going on at our house. We have recently repaired a major leak on our lower level (aka, the basement), which created a ton of dust (I … Continue reading Crazy making
Blue Eyes completed the ninth step letter I had requested of him. You know, the one I asked him to write to his eight year acting out partner. This letter I requested was to be written to the woman who blackmailed him for years with threats of exposing his secret to me. Written to the … Continue reading Closure
These are the words that send me to that place. That place where my insides feel like a big festering ulcer, where my head starts to ache and I feel an uneasy clamminess, like I need to purge. "It will never happen again." I was having a great day yesterday. I planned a romantic little … Continue reading “It will never happen again”