The good girl. The designated driver. The one who looks around for who might have dropped that $20 bill in the mall parking lot and then turns it in to the security desk. I'm the one who got straight A's, always. The teacher's pet. The good friend, never the mean girl. I'm the one who … Continue reading I’m that girl
mental health
What to do with me…
This morning a 20-something hazmat clean up crew guy tells me there is no way he believes I am over 50 years old. Thank you kind young man, you made my day. But it didn't last long. And the fact that a hazmat crew is at my house hits me like a ton of bricks. … Continue reading What to do with me…
B.P.D.
I wrote a post a couple years ago about suicide and also bits about my sister's mental illness. It will never be about us I describe a situation where she had harmed herself and was put in a suicidal lock-down ward of a local hospital. I took to her a gift of a little Beanie … Continue reading B.P.D.
Midtown mood
We have a number of different views out of our 14th story hotel room here in midtown Manhattan. We're here for business, but also visiting our Brooklyn son. The above is the view I have been staring at most of the day. I don't seem to be able to control my mood here in the … Continue reading Midtown mood
What’s different now
This is NOT a recap post about what is different in my life now versus prior to discovery of my husband's betrayal and secret life. That would be one bloody long post. Been there, done that. No, this is a post about my health. I haven't really posted about my health in a very long … Continue reading What’s different now
Context
I'm still completely enamored with Pink's latest album, Beautiful Trauma. I listen to it often. Many of the songs resonate. I've already written about a couple of her latest songs. Wild Hearts Can't Be Broken, today's song choice, feels particularly poignant these days. Not only is the song a venue for Alecia's amazing vocal talents, but … Continue reading Context
This is my time
I'm leaving early tomorrow morning, heading east, and I plan to be away from home for at least five weeks. I need this time. I feel lucky because my kids are grown and anything I need to do for work (which is very little at this point) can be done remotely. I'm lucky because my … Continue reading This is my time
A Woman Under the Influence
My younger son, The Peacemaker, is really into classic films. He is a budding filmmaker himself. He has subscribed to a website by which he can access old movies that aren't readily available on other sources. We've watched numerous films from all over the world and of varying genres and spanning decades. We recently watched … Continue reading A Woman Under the Influence
I understand why they leave
I've been away for a while. No real reason other than I have been busy and also dealing with some health issues. Sometimes no matter what we do, our aging bodies fail us. I started insulin last night for my diabetes, but that is a story for a different day. Today I'm talking about the … Continue reading I understand why they leave
Cycles
I feel like I am caught in a series of cycles. Menopause is one that is getting the better of me. I know I have written about this before, because I have been "going through" menopause since before I commenced writing this blog. I was about 35 years old when we made the decision not … Continue reading Cycles
try not to cry on my rainbow 