Choosing a blog title. Journal Entry: October 3, 2014 Today is the day I decided to take my painful journal entries and turn them into a blog. I was cleaning off my desk to prepare for my new adventure into the blogging world, and I picked up a picture I had painted with my niece. … Continue reading A bridge between sky and earth
Month: December 2014
The stalker whore makes an appearance
Tonight I have a number of other journal entries to post from our recent trip to Hawaii, as it turned out to be full of triggers and trauma, with some breakthroughs along the way, and I do want to share those. However, we just returned home and I am exhausted, depleted, anxious, and feeling sick... and … Continue reading The stalker whore makes an appearance
The self-cleaning vagina
Journal Entry: September 19, 2014 Last year my menstrual cycle started going all wacky. I missed periods then had a cycle twice one month. I’m pretty sure I’m heading into (or hopefully out of) menopause. I was also getting increased irritation and infections from the condoms we use. It seems we have tried them all, … Continue reading The self-cleaning vagina
The Golden Rule
As I sit here in paradise, it is obvious to me that the trauma symptoms from betrayal know no bounds. It doesn't matter how gorgeous the weather, or how blue the ocean waters, or how vibrant the tropical flowers, or how amazing the view is from the bathtub in our room, trauma is here, permeating … Continue reading The Golden Rule
Internet, dating, and sex addiction
This week December 11, 2014 Here I go, venting again. We are nearing the end of the corporate retreat portion of our Hawaii trip. Earlier this year we had to let an employee go, and we had already committed to a specific room count at the resort, so each of our boys ended up with … Continue reading Internet, dating, and sex addiction
So, let’s talk about “mind blowing” sex
Journal Entry: September 11, 2014 This term, “mind-blowing” sex has been ruminating in my head for months now. Today is the 8-month anniversary of dday. Early in my trauma journey, I read some blogs and articles by mistresses. I was trying to understand why women cheat with married men, especially single women seeking out married … Continue reading So, let’s talk about “mind blowing” sex
Anxiety
Today I have been away from WordPress for a couple days. I miss it. I miss reading about how people are doing. I miss posting on my own blog. I don’t want to fall too far behind since I have still not caught up on my old journal entries. I am currently in Hawaii managing … Continue reading Anxiety
Unbalanced
Journal Entry: September 8, 2014 We are currently visiting our older son in Montreal for his 23rd birthday. This would be the one that graduated college in May, The Pragmatist. He is living with his girlfriend in Montreal and figuring out what he wants to do for grad school. Thankfully, this son loves to work … Continue reading Unbalanced
Where my pain comes from today
Journal Entry: September 1, 2014 Today's thoughts to my husband: I can feel the time slipping away, like watching sand in an hourglass. Each day we get a little closer to the one year mark. I know you can feel it too. This is not the time to swoop in at the eleventh hour, to … Continue reading Where my pain comes from today
I don’t care if the world knows what my secrets are
Journal Entry: August 20, 2014 We are still out of town at the family reunion, but now my husband and I have our big vacation rental house on the golf course all to ourselves. My, it is peaceful. I have been doing surprisingly well. I only socialize when I want to. There aren’t the weird … Continue reading I don’t care if the world knows what my secrets are
try not to cry on my rainbow 