New artwork for the beach house master bedroom Sometimes I sit and wonder if it’s me. But then I quickly realize it isn’t. I didn’t create this horrid situation in our marriage. I’m not to blame for the bad shit that transpired. It’s a trick and a trap that those of us who care about … Continue reading I’m a reflection
married to a sex addict
It’s been one of those weeks…
Autumn Checking in here for the first time in months. Grrr. Writing, one of my passions, has gone by the wayside. It’s been one of those weeks, months, years? This week I had an absolutely wicked dental appointment with two cracked teeth, temporary crowns, and a wisdom tooth extraction. I sit here looking like a … Continue reading It’s been one of those weeks…
Some dreams do come true
Last weekend we went to visit Blue Eyes’ father in Los Angeles. Much to my astonishment, it has been an absolute pleasure dealing with Grandpa the past few months. Most of his grumpiness towards Blue Eyes and The Peacemaker is gone. Grandpa now laughs and jokes and says “I love you,” and “I miss you,” … Continue reading Some dreams do come true
Another cursed Valentine’s Day, come and gone…
I dislike Valentine’s Day, very much. I haven’t been shy about it here, that’s for sure. Blue Eyes planned a Staycation for us here at the new Portland Ritz Carlton. It’s a beautiful hotel if a little out of place in this city. Pretty fancy for us, especially with downtown still trying to get back … Continue reading Another cursed Valentine’s Day, come and gone…
It’s been 10 years….
January Camellias in Ojai Ten years since the phone call. Ten years of recovery and sobriety for Blue Eyes. Ten years of pain for me. The ten year anniversary of the phone call (8 days ago) was spent hiking to a snowy waterfall in Dunsmuir, CA and eating smash burgers with The Peacemaker, my forever … Continue reading It’s been 10 years….
Give me strength
A beautiful October morning in Portland I’m currently sitting on another plane heading down to Los Angeles. Blue Eyes was supposed to be the one on the plane. He was scheduled to be home for the weekend, to spend a little time in his own home, with me and The Peacemaker and his dog. I … Continue reading Give me strength
Abuse
I’m struggling with a sinus infection. I would like to be out in the garden planting my newly procured veggie starts, however, they will just have to wait a couple more days. The Peacemaker and I returned Sunday night from a month+ at our house in Ojai. This winter, Southern California ended its recent drought … Continue reading Abuse
Toxic People
We went retro this year and used The Peacemaker's first Hanukkiah. Night 6. I am so incredibly blessed to have both my boys home for the holiday season. I absolutely hate that I feel like I need to write this post, on Christmas. I try to write about the happy stuff too, but like Yelp … Continue reading Toxic People
Deflection
Winter Wonderland. Drive to the coast. December 2022. “I was shitty to everyone.“ That’s what he said when I mentioned how he treated me. That’s deflection. I used to be a religious follower of the American version of the TV show, “So You Think You Can Dance,’ until BE got rid of cable. Now we … Continue reading Deflection
Work life balance
As a quick side note, yesterday was the 8-year anniversary of this blog. Woohoo! 601 posts later, I'm still here. This blog was a life saver on many many days. Mostly fellow bloggers and blog followers were a life saver to me, so thank you from the bottom of my heart. Now, back to writing... … Continue reading Work life balance
try not to cry on my rainbow 