I have been writing a lot about Blue Eyes and his fourth step (that searching and fearless moral inventory, the one that Blue Eyes completed a few weeks ago and which is pages and pages and pages long) and fifth step (admitted to God, to themselves, and to another human being the exact nature of … Continue reading Why didn’t I think of me
survival after betrayal
Torn
Best laid plans, and all. For the fourth, we were set to drive up north for the big family picnic and barbecue, and we even drove almost half way there before I realized I had forgotten my medications, which include high blood pressure meds, and birth control pills. Two things I need to take on time. … Continue reading Torn
Oh happy day!
There are a few reasons I am feeling much happier today. First, Blue Eyes and I had a long discussion this afternoon regarding taking a break from couple's counseling. At first he thought we should continue because I seemed to be in a better mood when we left counseling each Tuesday afternoon. After I explained … Continue reading Oh happy day!
Don’t do it…
If you are thinking of straying, don't. Don't do it. Take the mightier, healthier, bolder, more righteous path. Choose to be honest and faithful and live with integrity no matter what has been done to you. If you feel lonely, or tired, or sad, or broken or useless or used or neglected, stop and think. … Continue reading Don’t do it…
Stumbling down the road to recovery
And the journey to recovery continues. I have never lived with a recovering addict, but I am pretty intuitive. I knew it wasn't going to be as easy as acknowledging his addiction and just saying no to his drug. That is called white knuckling it, and not getting to the root of the problem. They … Continue reading Stumbling down the road to recovery
The highjacking of empathy
I was going to go out and train for a marathon, maybe run a few miles... but the high temp forecast here in the Pacific Northwest is hovering around the ridiculously freakin' hot level (100 degrees), so I will stay safely inside and work, blog, and paint. Seriously though, you know I was kidding about the … Continue reading The highjacking of empathy
Happy Dad’s Day
Yeah, so the above reminds me of a bunch of men in my life, not just Blue Eyes. I am happy to report that we had a Father's Day barbecue at our house and I prepared everything (except the strawberry pie for my step father because he loves anything strawberry, which was purchased from a … Continue reading Happy Dad’s Day
Why I stay
I have seen this saying floating around the web for a while, and I like it for the sole reason that it makes me think. It speaks to the question of whether people can change, or not. I don't think who we "really" are is a stagnant concept. I don't believe we come into this world … Continue reading Why I stay
A desperate need for structure
As previously mentioned, a separation period has been discussed. I had suggested starting with three months. When Blue Eyes asked me when I wanted to start the separation I said, "I don't." He seemed confused. I explained to him that when I spoke of a separation, I wanted him to know how I thought it would … Continue reading A desperate need for structure
The blog of me
Photo: my favorite tea cup from my collection, and my favorite macarons from my favorite local bakery. Disclaimer: this photo was not taken recently. I am not sitting here eating a pile of french macarons. 🙂 I guess I am in some kind of hella writing mood today, this week, this month? Blue Eyes and … Continue reading The blog of me
