If I ever thought I would run out of things to write for my blog, I was mistaken. Even if there is nothing interesting enough to write about going on in my life, other bloggers daily give me ideas of topics to write about. Every day I am either prompted by another’s blog topic, or … Continue reading We are all in pain
survival after betrayal
And then jet lag happened
“I knew that if I allowed fear to overtake me, my journey was doomed. Fear, to a great extent, is born of a story we tell ourselves, and so I chose to tell myself a different story from the one women are told. I decided I was safe. I was strong. I was brave. Nothing … Continue reading And then jet lag happened
A ray of sunshine
I have been inspired by a betrayed spouse blogger and his incredibly happy and positive post today. Anyone reading my blog knows that I was recently in Japan. Japan holds a lot of triggers for me and I still have one more journal entry I wrote in Japan that will be very painful to post... … Continue reading A ray of sunshine
What I wish he had said
"Life is a process. We are a process. The universe is a process." -Anne Wilson Schaef Journal Entry: January 16, 2015 A couple months ago I asked my husband to write something about his first step that I could post on my blog. He hemmed and hawed and procrastinated and eventually wrote something, and then … Continue reading What I wish he had said
How do I know it isn’t real, part two
Journal Entry, Cont’d: January 15, 2015 The story of Camilla: Winter 2005, Blue Eyes was feeling like shit. His relationship with his family was on a serious downward slide. I was incredibly busy with our kids and my volunteer work. At the time, he was managing four start-up businesses with all the stress that goes … Continue reading How do I know it isn’t real, part two
How do I know it isn’t real, part one
I have been working on this journal entry/post for days now. It has been incredibly difficult for me, and my husband. I suffered numerous bouts of trauma and some self harm while we were in Japan. We are home now and my arm looks like a tiger got it. I hate when I get in that … Continue reading How do I know it isn’t real, part one
Who killed Bambi’s mother
Journal Entry: January 9, 2015 We arrived Narita airport at approximately 2:30 this afternoon, Japan time. The flight was relatively uneventful. The stalker whore was not on the plane, not that I know of anyway. We exited the plane, quickly navigated immigration and customs, and headed to the Japan Rail office to change the train … Continue reading Who killed Bambi’s mother
Another dark road, part two
Hello All. Well, this is it, January 11. I have reached the one year anniversary of discovery day. In about eight hours, it will be the exact moment one year ago today that a delusional woman called me on my mobile phone and informed me that she had been having sex with my husband for … Continue reading Another dark road, part two
Another dark road, part one
As I sit here in trigger "happy" Tokyo, I decided I would post this entry from back in Hawaii in December. My words then represent some of my feelings as I sit here in a place where my husband traveled with his affair partner three times over a period of four years. I am journaling, … Continue reading Another dark road, part one
I watched him sleep
Journal Entry: November 7, 2014 "One foot in front of the other. Keep breathing just like they taught you. You politely ask to take a walk with me. I would have married you there underneath the trees. Is it real, this thing? Is it real, ooooh, this thing? When you sleep. I could make you … Continue reading I watched him sleep
try not to cry on my rainbow 