Journal Entry: April 18, 2014 We returned from our cruise vacation a few days ago and we are both sick. I am physically sick with an upper respiratory infection, and I am also very sick, and tired, of my husband’s last acting out partner calling our phones. She had called both our mobile phones numerous … Continue reading Contact with the other woman
PTSD
These are a few of my favorite triggers
Journal Entry: April 16, 2014 I have already journaled about some of the most disturbing and prevalent triggers in my life including planes, airports, hotel rooms, and cities they traveled to together. My husband’s mobile phone and laptop are also huge triggers as he spent a great deal of time texting, sexting, calling and emailing … Continue reading These are a few of my favorite triggers
Please let me off this psychotherapy hamster wheel
April 17, 2014 “He who controls others may be powerful, but he who has mastered himself is mightier still.” Lao Tzu We returned home yesterday from our cruise. My husband is sick with a throat infection and we are both exhausted. The trip was like a roller coaster ride. One day to the next, emotions … Continue reading Please let me off this psychotherapy hamster wheel
Trauma on the high seas
Journal Entry: March 31, 2014 Letter to my husband: Thirty years ago you started courting me. My life would never be the same. I was not shopping for a husband and I wasn't ready. After a mere seven months of knowing you, I fell in love. I fell in love with who I thought you were. … Continue reading Trauma on the high seas
Thank goodness we can’t tell the future
Journal Entry: March 27, 2014 "Thank goodness we can't tell the future. We'd never get out of bed." Julia Roberts as Barbara Weston in August: Osage County. We are on our way to Miami. Our 15-night Panama Canal cruise leaves port Sunday. So here I go on another trigger filled holiday with my cheating, sex-addict hubby … Continue reading Thank goodness we can’t tell the future
Not sure this one’s going to stick either
Journal Entry: March 17, 2014 I think most everyone can relate to being betrayed by a spouse. Obviously not everyone has experienced it, but most can imagine how devastating it would be. Having your husband diagnosed as a sex addict (versus a “cheater”) on the other hand, brings with it a whole different kind of … Continue reading Not sure this one’s going to stick either
Dude, sorry we’re so miserable, but we really do love your ranch
Journal Entry: March 16, 2014 In January, after B’s initial sex addict diagnosis and his therapist’s recommendation that B immediately check himself in to the Meadows Sex Addiction recovery program for 45 days, and B’s subsequent dismissal of this advice, B did start looking for a seminar to attend. He felt particularly drawn to the … Continue reading Dude, sorry we’re so miserable, but we really do love your ranch
A downward spiral into my abyss
Journal Entry: Valentine's Day, 2014 I now hate Valentine's day. While we were in Hawaii, I was obsessing about the acting out partner and why anyone would want such a dysfunctional, vacuous relationship. I went on and on about how she never got to spend any real time with him, how could she possibly think … Continue reading A downward spiral into my abyss
OMG, are you effing kidding me…
Journal Entry: February 6 & 7, 2014 Last night, we departed our comfy hammock in the grass hand in hand beneath an amazing star filled sky. We walked back to our gorgeous room overlooking the ocean, and made love. My arms hurt like hell, but my heart soared. I actually got a few hours sleep and … Continue reading OMG, are you effing kidding me…
triggers and glimmers
Journal Entry: February 2, 2014 We got on a plane together for the first time since I found out my husband has been cheating for 15 years and taking his mistress on business trips for the past 5 years. I asked him how he was able to take his mistress on ten trips over the past … Continue reading triggers and glimmers
try not to cry on my rainbow 