Journal Entry: September 11, 2014 This term, “mind-blowing” sex has been ruminating in my head for months now. Today is the 8-month anniversary of dday. Early in my trauma journey, I read some blogs and articles by mistresses. I was trying to understand why women cheat with married men, especially single women seeking out married … Continue reading So, let’s talk about “mind blowing” sex
why people cheat
Where my pain comes from today
Journal Entry: September 1, 2014 Today's thoughts to my husband: I can feel the time slipping away, like watching sand in an hourglass. Each day we get a little closer to the one year mark. I know you can feel it too. This is not the time to swoop in at the eleventh hour, to … Continue reading Where my pain comes from today
A present day breakthrough
Yesterday I wrote a blog post that included a journal entry from this past August. I talked about how that day, August 14, was the one-year anniversary of the day my husband broke up with his eight-year affair partner on a drive home from a one-day business trip to a nearby city. Coincidentally, last night … Continue reading A present day breakthrough
The phone bill doesn’t lie
journal Entry: August 8, 2014 Things have been going pretty well since our anniversary. No real overly dramatic moments for me, although the PTSD still knocks me on my ass on a regular basis. Our older son visited for a few days last week and we all went out to our new beach property. My husband was able … Continue reading The phone bill doesn’t lie
Feeding the Beast: my husband’s affair partners
journal Entry: July 30, 2014 Today is the anniversary of the last time my husband had sexual relations with a woman other than me. Nearly 30 years after we started dating, and one day after our 24th wedding anniversary, my husband had a "quickie" sexual liaison with his eight year affair partner, for the very … Continue reading Feeding the Beast: my husband’s affair partners
A downward spiral into my abyss
Journal Entry: Valentine's Day, 2014 I now hate Valentine's day. While we were in Hawaii, I was obsessing about the acting out partner and why anyone would want such a dysfunctional, vacuous relationship. I went on and on about how she never got to spend any real time with him, how could she possibly think … Continue reading A downward spiral into my abyss
She keeps calling and I am devolving
Journal Entry: Thursday, January 16, 2014 He sleeps, and sleeps. He is sick. I cannot sleep. I am at my desk at 5:30am. This is definitely not me. I cannot get out of my own head. Meeting with my friend and the benign phone call with my Father seem like years ago. My husband came … Continue reading She keeps calling and I am devolving
Damn you Craig, and your list, whoever you are.
"When truth is buried it grows, it chokes, it gathers such an explosive force that on the day it bursts out it blows up everything with it." Emile Zola Journal Entry: Sunday, January 12, 2014 I made it through the night with my husband. In the nearly 30 years we have been together, I have … Continue reading Damn you Craig, and your list, whoever you are.