While enjoying a nice respite from the shenanigans of the sister, back in early 2005, the heat was picking up in terms of Blue Eyes' parents and his brother. The brother had started in earnest on his mission to destroy any reasonable relationship Blue Eyes had with the parents. From the beginning of time, mil had … Continue reading On letting go, part two
married to a sex addict
On letting go, part one
I am taking a break from my travel blogging to get something off my chest. I am hoping that writing this out will help me release some of the feelings that threaten to hold me back, push me down, engulf me.... feelings that haunt me and make me question the validity of my choices. Everywhere I … Continue reading On letting go, part one
My day in the big apple
Arriving JFK I am doing better in terms of my healing. It might be difficult to tell since I have not been writing as much. I love to write, so I am not quite sure why the big breaks from blogging. Perhaps just the nature of the blog. I started it to write out my pain, … Continue reading My day in the big apple
The battle
I am consciously realizing my path to healing, as the betrayed spouse of a sex addict, is the shorter one of the two of us. I instinctively knew it would be, but it is so obvious now. My life journey included a childhood that shaped me, we all have one, many times fraught with heartache, … Continue reading The battle
Revisiting empathy
Playing with color: An interpretation of my view, 16" x 20", oil on canvas Progress not perfection, is a running theme around our house. A conversation amongst betrayed spouses this morning regarding empathy made me think of, well, a bunch of my blog entries, but specifically this one: And then it all went to s*%t. That … Continue reading Revisiting empathy
The awakening
Photo credit: photoguy777.deviantart.com/art/Pink-Rose A few days ago I was looking for some paperwork I had carelessly tossed somewhere at some point probably as much as two years ago, and in that process I opened the upper left hand drawer of my desk. Inside that drawer is a desperate and depraved accounting of the first few … Continue reading The awakening
On being “strong”
Ocean Waters 2, 10" x 10" oil on canvas “To share your weakness is to make yourself vulnerable; to make yourself vulnerable is to show your strength.” ~Criss Jami I find the above quote so intriguing. When I think of it in terms of Blue Eyes, I think sure that is his greatest challenge. To … Continue reading On being “strong”
The difference between an affair and an addiction
I was just over at Cheater Fantasy's Blog commenting on her post: 'Sex and Love Addiction'. At the end of the post she poses the following question: "How does a sex addict differ from a person who has an affair?" I have thought a great deal about this question over the months, especially as I read other … Continue reading The difference between an affair and an addiction
Protecting my heart
After hours and hours of individual trauma therapy, one of the pivotal pieces of advice I ostensibly came away with was that I needed to take better care of myself. I needed to focus more on what truly makes me a whole person and not focus so much on the needs of others. I had done … Continue reading Protecting my heart
Love is a precious gift
"The most precious gift you can give to the one you love is your true presence." -Thich Nhat Hanh I cut back on my blog reading and writing, trying to spend less time in front of a computer screen and more time being present with Blue Eyes in the evenings. I have arrived at a … Continue reading Love is a precious gift
try not to cry on my rainbow 