https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=6NXnxTNIWkc And so I cry sometimes when I'm lying in bedJust to get it all out what's in my headAnd I, I am feeling a little peculiar And so I wake in the morning and I step outside And I take a deep breath and I get real high And I scream from the top … Continue reading What’s going on
Actions, not words
Strangely enough, I’m still trying to get Blue Eyes to stop taking his phone into the bathroom. It was on the boundary list all those years ago. He stopped for a long time, but has been back at it for a while. Why do people even want to have their phone in the bathroom? Beyond … Continue reading Actions, not words
You are going to be okay, part two
The sun is shining, the birds are chirping, blossoms are popping, it’s spring in Portland. I’m doing some cleaning of the closets and other such spring kinda stuff. Life is not perfect, but it’s good. Eleven years ago today, I was three months into healing from the most shocking revelation, that my husband was a … Continue reading You are going to be okay, part two
I’m a reflection
New artwork for the beach house master bedroom Sometimes I sit and wonder if it’s me. But then I quickly realize it isn’t. I didn’t create this horrid situation in our marriage. I’m not to blame for the bad shit that transpired. It’s a trick and a trap that those of us who care about … Continue reading I’m a reflection
11:11 and a whole lot more
On the 11th of last month, we hit eleven years since discovery. Unbelievable how quickly the time has flown. Or has it? Some days yes, many, many days, NO! New front door on the Ojai Casa I started this entry last month, but didn’t finish it, so now it includes even more fun family stuff. … Continue reading 11:11 and a whole lot more
It’s been one of those weeks…
Autumn Checking in here for the first time in months. Grrr. Writing, one of my passions, has gone by the wayside. It’s been one of those weeks, months, years? This week I had an absolutely wicked dental appointment with two cracked teeth, temporary crowns, and a wisdom tooth extraction. I sit here looking like a … Continue reading It’s been one of those weeks…
Some dreams do come true
Last weekend we went to visit Blue Eyes’ father in Los Angeles. Much to my astonishment, it has been an absolute pleasure dealing with Grandpa the past few months. Most of his grumpiness towards Blue Eyes and The Peacemaker is gone. Grandpa now laughs and jokes and says “I love you,” and “I miss you,” … Continue reading Some dreams do come true
Another day, another cheater
Yesterday I visited my favorite “downtown Ojai” interiors store. I put downtown in quotes because Ojai is a very small town. Barely 8,000 residents, but it has lots going for it, like great shopping (albeit expensive), yummy restaurants, lots of fun events like the Memorial Weekend Arts Fair, a juniors tennis tournament, music festivals, two … Continue reading Another day, another cheater
Another cursed Valentine’s Day, come and gone…
I dislike Valentine’s Day, very much. I haven’t been shy about it here, that’s for sure. Blue Eyes planned a Staycation for us here at the new Portland Ritz Carlton. It’s a beautiful hotel if a little out of place in this city. Pretty fancy for us, especially with downtown still trying to get back … Continue reading Another cursed Valentine’s Day, come and gone…
It’s been 10 years….
January Camellias in Ojai Ten years since the phone call. Ten years of recovery and sobriety for Blue Eyes. Ten years of pain for me. The ten year anniversary of the phone call (8 days ago) was spent hiking to a snowy waterfall in Dunsmuir, CA and eating smash burgers with The Peacemaker, my forever … Continue reading It’s been 10 years….
try not to cry on my rainbow 