“D, I’ve decided that in order to continue having a relationship with you, I need to be able to say my piece without any interruption. I realize, of course, that you have your own stories, feelings, trauma, etc… and me speaking my mind is in no way minimizing your story or your feelings. Our story … Continue reading Letter to the sister in law
Family, and anxiety
I’m home from a glorious trip to Hawaii. For the first 5 days it was me, Blue Eyes, and The Peacemaker celebrating their 60th & 30th birthdays respectively. Last week was spent with my mom, step dad, my brother GQ, his wife, and The Princess. My mom turned 80, and The Princess turned 9. For … Continue reading Family, and anxiety
What made me
The last time I was down in LA, the sister in law cornered me. Her mom used to do this with people. Get them alone and then blast them with venom and hate. Both mother in law and sister in law did this with Blue Eyes regularly. He was an easy target and he never … Continue reading What made me
Perfect husband
I’m sick, again. I have the worst immune system. It’s not covid, but a head cold that moved into my chest with a little bit of pneumonia thrown in. My boys are all down in Los Angeles with Grandpa. He’ll be on his own soon enough as we leave for our annual trip to Hawaii … Continue reading Perfect husband
Give me strength
A beautiful October morning in Portland I’m currently sitting on another plane heading down to Los Angeles. Blue Eyes was supposed to be the one on the plane. He was scheduled to be home for the weekend, to spend a little time in his own home, with me and The Peacemaker and his dog. I … Continue reading Give me strength
Loneliness
All we can hope for is that Blue Eyes’ father feels a little better with us here. It occurred to Pooh and Piglet that they hadn't heard from Eeyore for several days, so they put on their hats and coats and trotted across the Hundred Acre Wood to Eeyore's stick house. Inside the house was … Continue reading Loneliness
A state of shock
My mother in law wasn’t young, and more recently she had become more frail, however, the overwhelming sentiment by every single person upon hearing of her sudden death, is shock and disbelief. I was not the only person who thought she would outlive us all. Her entire life, she was bigger than life. She was … Continue reading A state of shock
Hurts 2B human
"Hope flows awayIf you could spend a day in my shoesYour mind would changeIf you'd known what I've gone throughWe want the same (Yeah, we do)Maybe then you'll understandHow it hurts to be human Oh God, it hurts to be human" Y'all know how much I love Pink and her music and her boldness and … Continue reading Hurts 2B human
Taking the hit
Mingei International Museum, Balboa Park, San Diego, CA I wrote previously about the situation with my youngest brother, The Listener. He worked for us for 17 years. I hired him out of college at 24. I fired him seven months ago. A lot happened in both our lives during the time he worked for our … Continue reading Taking the hit
Abuse
I’m struggling with a sinus infection. I would like to be out in the garden planting my newly procured veggie starts, however, they will just have to wait a couple more days. The Peacemaker and I returned Sunday night from a month+ at our house in Ojai. This winter, Southern California ended its recent drought … Continue reading Abuse
try not to cry on my rainbow 