The road out is not straight and smooth. I felt bad for Blue Eyes last week. He attended a meeting with one of his favorite 12 step guys and during sharing he found out the guy had lost his sobriety a couple weeks prior. He was four years in and now he's starting over at … Continue reading The long and winding road
survival after betrayal
Travelogue: Tokyo
So, as much as I tried to stay mad at Blue Eyes (not really... I don't try to stay mad at anyone) it is impossible to stay sad or mad in Japan. It just is. It is so strange here and I really cannot walk five steps without going, WTF? But in a good way, … Continue reading Travelogue: Tokyo
I’m here
Since my arrival back east, a few things have happened. I have not looked back. I have not been bored or homesick or sad. I love it here, but I know my time here will come to an end and so I prepare to head back home eventually and enlist a new mindset. I'll embrace it … Continue reading I’m here
I’ve made a lot of excuses
As much as I would love to say I am just pleasantly plump, or a little chubby, I have a lot of fat on my body. I teeter between overweight and obese, per all those handy BMI calculators. For me to give this diabetes control situation a chance, I need to get into the normal … Continue reading I’ve made a lot of excuses
Complacency
It's been a while since I have been here blogging. I read, and sometimes comment, but writing on my blog is a whole different beast. Some days I feel like I could write ten entries, and then suddenly it feels like weeks go by without the desire, or the time... I am often thinking about blogging because my … Continue reading Complacency
And while I’m on the topic…
Looking for something else, I came across this approximately five year old Newsweek article regarding sex addiction, which I had seen oh so many months ago. The Sex Addiction Epidemic In re-reading through the article, I had an "aha" moment. Honestly, in the case of me and Blue Eyes, post discovery mid January 2014, I … Continue reading And while I’m on the topic…
“The most important thing is integrity”
If you don't want anyone to find out, don't do it. Sometimes I run across new and informative articles on sex addiction, hopefully as unbiased and with the least amount of judgment and hate as possible. The Fix is a great resource for articles written by and about real people dealing with addiction and recovery. I … Continue reading “The most important thing is integrity”
Therapy is nice…
So, I think I am at this place. The place where I can get past those horrible, frustrating, triggering, and often times painful moments without more therapy. At least for now. I cancelled my last two therapy appointments. I just wasn't feeling it. But, never say never, right? A couple things I love about the … Continue reading Therapy is nice…
Breakfast conversation
My rose petal breakfast tea. We are here in La La Land and Blue Eyes has back to back meetings... conference calls, in-person meetings, etc... He broke away for 20 minutes to have room service breakfast with me. Honestly I don't know where this conversation came from, I can't remember, but as I sat there … Continue reading Breakfast conversation
Hashtag, The Struggle Is Real
I don't know what it is, but I love this crazy saying, hashtag thingy, whatever. The Struggle Is Real. Maybe it is because when people use the hashtag, it is usually in conjunction with something silly, like #FirstWorldProblems, #TheStruggleIsReal, I just ate three boxes of Girl Scout cookies for lunch, type of thing. The other … Continue reading Hashtag, The Struggle Is Real
try not to cry on my rainbow 