We recently returned from a trip back east. I had a splendid time despite the fact that it rained most of the time we were in Chicago and, our flight to NYC was cancelled and rescheduled so that we had to travel on The Peacemaker's birthday, something we didn't want to have to do. But … Continue reading Where did the feelings go?
surviving infidelity
Introspection
Since our blogs are formatted a little differently, I'm not re-blogging, but I am sharing an article that Rac (Life After His Affair) linked to on her blog this morning. https://thoughtcatalog.com/kirsten-j-robinson/2017/05/before-you-cheat-on-her-know-this/ This piece is beautifully written and will speak, in some way or another, to all of us who have been betrayed. But, the author … Continue reading Introspection
I’m sorry
Sometimes I feel like I need to put out a disclaimer before I start typing. Although we are moving forward together, me with Blue eyes, and I am healing, and I keep writing because it helps me feel better in the moment, this ride is so tumultuous, some days I feel like I'm going to … Continue reading I’m sorry
Is trust all it’s cracked up to be?
First, as I typed "all it's cracked up to be" the phrase struck me as quite odd. So, I looked up it's origin. Strange. The Phrase Finder I have asked myself and many others have asked me, if I will ever be able to trust my husband again. I realize there are about a bazillion memes … Continue reading Is trust all it’s cracked up to be?
More about year four
We returned Saturday night from a wonderful road trip to Yosemite National Park in California, but that is not what I am writing about today. Today, I need to go back in time a couple weeks and discuss a conversation between me and Blue Eyes. I have been spending more and more time at the … Continue reading More about year four
Another missing piece
As mentioned previously on this blog, I periodically perform an internet search of people I know, specifically my husband and kids. I have done this for a long time, way before dday. Mostly it used to be fun. Blue Eyes used to have a lot of links and photos, etc... when he was still on social … Continue reading Another missing piece
I cried, just a little…
I'm taking a break from my vacation travel posts to focus on the reality of today. We have been going through some stressful shit. I'm doing my best to not let it get to me, but then I realize although Blue Eyes wants for us to share in the handling of this rather unfortunate circumstance … Continue reading I cried, just a little…
So, what was wrong with my marriage?
I have spent a great deal of time over the past three years defending my marriage in my own mind. Mainly because I needed to come to terms with whether it was worth it to me to keep nurturing it. What it all really comes down to, for me, has nothing to do with a … Continue reading So, what was wrong with my marriage?
Getting to that place
First there was the earth shattering revelation that my husband had cheated on me. Repeatedly. Then there was the pain, the shock, the confusion, the heartache, and the continued torture of hearing all the things he had done that broke apart my world. Then there was me, falling to the ground in agony. There was … Continue reading Getting to that place
Just another love story. Part seventeen: the early years, with children
If you have been reading my blog, specifically these entries about our history, you know that I was living a certain reality, loving life, hating my in-laws, married with a new baby, struggling to make ends meet, but you also know the bigger picture, and the reality that my husband was living a very different version of … Continue reading Just another love story. Part seventeen: the early years, with children
try not to cry on my rainbow 