Beautiful trauma

 

I have mentioned P!NK a few times on my blog… okay, a lot of times on my blog. I love her, I really do. I have cried to her songs, I have laughed to her songs, and mostly I have exercised to her songs. She’s special. I know she’s been through a lot and she writes a lot of great lyrics and she inspires a lot of people. I’m one of them.

My birthday was last week. I returned from North Carolina in time for Mother’s Day, and then my birthday, and then my birthday present from Blue Eyes, tickets to see P!NK in concert here in Portland on Tuesday, May 15. OMG!!! I have not been to a concert in years. I was so excited, and… wait for it…. I was not the oldest lady in the arena!!! The concert was amazing. I never stopped singing and dancing, not once during that show. I logged about 15,000 steps during the concert, ha! It was a night I won’t soon forget. Before attending the concert I downloaded her latest album, Beautiful Trauma, and listened to it over and over while logging thousands of steps in 80 degree sunshine. My happiest of happy places include sunshine and P!NK. I love every single song on the Beautiful Trauma album, but most of all, I love the title.

My birthday present to myself this year is what I have dubbed my beautiful trauma tattoo. I took something that represented one of the worst, most destructive days of my life, and I commemorated my survival. Nearly four years from the day I sliced my arm open with a broken shard of pottery, I got my first tattoo. I had the tattoo placed over the scar.

scar

May 10, 2014, 15 stitches later.

scar

Two years later.

Now when I obsessively look down, or want to feel the raised skin, I see the most beautiful sprig of cherry blossoms.

IMG_6197 (1)

Four years later.

I got the tattoo in Durham, North Carolina. A friend spent three long, grueling hours with me while an artist drew the tattoo, outlined the tattoo in black, and filled it in. Usually the first or second question I am asked by anyone who doesn’t have a tattoo… did it hurt? Yeah, it hurt, but I have a high threshold for pain, and I think I’m kinda attached to the idea of getting another one. I kept the tattoo a surprise from Blue Eyes until I returned home the following week. I wanted to keep it all for me, at least for a little bit. I have absolutely zero regrets about my rather largish, for me, tattoo. I absolutely love it, and I love what it reminds me of: survival, stamina, strength, perseverance, and beauty. It also represents our deep connection to Japan and in Japan the cherry blossom represents the fragility and the beauty of LIFE, and the sakura (cherry blossom) is also revered as a symbol of rebirth.

I am so thankful for the life I have now, and I love being reminded of that. ❤

 

30 thoughts on “Beautiful trauma

  1. Wow Kat! I love this! I love what you did with that scar! You transformed it just like transformed yourself! I’m so amazed by and proud of you and how far you’ve come- and the tremendous amount of grace you did it with! Happy Belated Birthday to you!❤️

    Liked by 1 person

  2. You look happy, content, toned, and just generally awesome and amazing. And the tat looks great too! What a beautiful transformation. As we all work to reclaim/ retake things stolen from us by betrayal, I feel as though you’ve literally reclaimed your body. Very inspiring!
    xo

    Liked by 1 person

    • I feel happy and all that, but being home does bring with it it’s own set of challenges. I am finding exercise to be my happy place now. Never thought I would ever say that! I hope things are equalizing for you. ❤️

      Liked by 1 person

      • I’m sure it’s a challenge to be home with work and life in general.

        Things are stabilizing in our household, thankfully. Omar was worth every penny. (But if I hear any more about the Man Box my head might explode.)

        I’ll shoot you an email when I get a few moments of peace.

        Keep taking great care of yourself!
        ❤️

        Liked by 2 people

  3. Happy belated birthday! You should have come down and we could have celebrated! (Probably couldn’t have due to young son…but).
    Love the tat! I have two. I can’t remember exactly what the second one says and it’s on my back so I don’t see it. The one on my hip I rarely see but I do know what it says.
    Big changes are coming for me.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Love this post and love the tattoo. You’ve got me considering getting one now. Yes, I’m asking everyone who has a tattoo if
    it hurt. Unlike you, I’m a big chicken when it comes to pain. You look great!

    Liked by 1 person

    • I do LOVE mine. As a matter of fact, we’re traveling to NYC today and I am wearing a long sleeve shirt and am considering changing to short sleeves just so I can see my tattoo, LOL. Maybe I am a little obsessed! Get a little tattoo… it won’t be that bad. 🙂 ❤

      Like

    • I totally agree regarding the tattoo. You are definitely an inspiration for me. I can’t wait to see what you do for your next one. And thanks for the compliment. I do feel fit, but gotta keep it up, every.single.day! xoxo

      Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s