These days... I book expensive travel. Simple as that. I used to book travel so that our little family could spend time together. Blue Eyes often was either working away from home or traveled a lot for business when our children were little. For quite a while he was away from home 20-23 days of … Continue reading Guess what I do when I’m really pissed off
family
Where to start…
Wow, it's been a while. It's August already. How did that happen? I missed a whole month here on the blog. I have been trying to keep up with the few blogs I follow. Please know that I am here and I feel the pain. I remember all the stages, vividly. I am thrilled and … Continue reading Where to start…
Not the lesser Babka
As it turns out, I am suffering from a concussion. I am assuming it is mild since my current symptoms are mild. I have a doc appointment tomorrow afternoon, just to make sure that I am taking the proper precautions. We head out of town tomorrow night on a business trip. I am currently absolutely … Continue reading Not the lesser Babka
Family
The end of each year, from Thanksgiving to New Years Day, brings with it a lot of family time for pretty much everyone we know. For the first couple of years of recovery, this family time was fraught with trauma and anxiety. Some people know about Blue Eyes' secret life, but many do not. I … Continue reading Family
Where did the feelings go?
We recently returned from a trip back east. I had a splendid time despite the fact that it rained most of the time we were in Chicago and, our flight to NYC was cancelled and rescheduled so that we had to travel on The Peacemaker's birthday, something we didn't want to have to do. But … Continue reading Where did the feelings go?
A weight on my shoulders
As much as I love my beach house, and I do love it, and I have spent lots of time there recently, this has been a trying summer so far for me and Blue Eyes. He has been working A LOT. We have been apart. He has been traveling, very few overnights, but many many … Continue reading A weight on my shoulders
It will never be about us
I have had numerous conversations lately swirling around the heartbreaking topic of suicide. It's one of those things that seems to happen in waves, but in fact happens all the time, thoughts of it, and the actual act of it. The familiar words of regret from those left behind, family, friends... insisting there was something … Continue reading It will never be about us
Road trip to Yosemite
Wow did we have fun last week! We took my incredibly comfortable road trip car and headed down to California. The Peacemaker joined us. We have a friend who is a hobby photographer (and he's pretty damn good) who had visited Yosemite a few years back. He took some spectacular photos, and ever since seeing … Continue reading Road trip to Yosemite
We know it’s not our fault
The very last thing I did before the appraisal person arrived at our house last week, was make one last run through of The Peacemaker's bedroom and make his bed the way it was intended to be made. He was grumbling upstairs about where was he supposed to go while the appraiser was here. The appraisal … Continue reading We know it’s not our fault
Just another love story. Part seventeen: the early years, with children
If you have been reading my blog, specifically these entries about our history, you know that I was living a certain reality, loving life, hating my in-laws, married with a new baby, struggling to make ends meet, but you also know the bigger picture, and the reality that my husband was living a very different version of … Continue reading Just another love story. Part seventeen: the early years, with children