I'm leaving early tomorrow morning, heading east, and I plan to be away from home for at least five weeks. I need this time. I feel lucky because my kids are grown and anything I need to do for work (which is very little at this point) can be done remotely. I'm lucky because my … Continue reading This is my time
married to a sex addict
Turbulence on re-entry
At this point, I feel like readers are pretty aware that with all the fun of travel and beach houses, and all that jazz going on in my life, inevitably struggles will sneak their way in because, you know, living with a sex addict ain't easy. Frankly, after 33 years, I'm not sure living with … Continue reading Turbulence on re-entry
I’m sorry
Sometimes I feel like I need to put out a disclaimer before I start typing. Although we are moving forward together, me with Blue eyes, and I am healing, and I keep writing because it helps me feel better in the moment, this ride is so tumultuous, some days I feel like I'm going to … Continue reading I’m sorry
More about year four
We returned Saturday night from a wonderful road trip to Yosemite National Park in California, but that is not what I am writing about today. Today, I need to go back in time a couple weeks and discuss a conversation between me and Blue Eyes. I have been spending more and more time at the … Continue reading More about year four
Another missing piece
As mentioned previously on this blog, I periodically perform an internet search of people I know, specifically my husband and kids. I have done this for a long time, way before dday. Mostly it used to be fun. Blue Eyes used to have a lot of links and photos, etc... when he was still on social … Continue reading Another missing piece
So, what was wrong with my marriage?
I have spent a great deal of time over the past three years defending my marriage in my own mind. Mainly because I needed to come to terms with whether it was worth it to me to keep nurturing it. What it all really comes down to, for me, has nothing to do with a … Continue reading So, what was wrong with my marriage?
Does time heal wounds
My answer is: no. “This life is for loving, sharing, learning, smiling, caring, forgiving, laughing, hugging, helping, dancing, wondering, healing, and even more loving. I choose to live life this way. I want to live my life in such a way that when I get out of bed in the morning, the devil says, 'aw … Continue reading Does time heal wounds
Forever a work in progress
I have now been here, in my little home away from home, for five full weeks. Did I ever mention that I had never lived on my own before? I went straight from my parents house(s) to college life with roommates, to living with a partner and then to raising a family and building my own home … Continue reading Forever a work in progress
Complacency
It's been a while since I have been here blogging. I read, and sometimes comment, but writing on my blog is a whole different beast. Some days I feel like I could write ten entries, and then suddenly it feels like weeks go by without the desire, or the time... I am often thinking about blogging because my … Continue reading Complacency
Looking back, just like any other day
I am moving right past the fact that this is it, right now, as I type this, the two year anniversary of the discovery day phone call. Blue Eyes did write me a beautiful and loving thank you note acknowledging that he knows what this day represents to me and that he is grateful for everything … Continue reading Looking back, just like any other day
try not to cry on my rainbow 