Yeah, per how I left yesterday's post, it's tomorrow and I'm dealing with it and I realized how off I am. Discovery day was January 11, 2014. Somehow I thought yesterday was the 11th? Well here in the United States of America TODAY is January 11th. I really only had one D-day. There was a … Continue reading It’s tomorrow
I've written numerous times here of my support of the 12 step program for addicts, especially sex addicts. I have read numerous blog entries over the years from people whose opinion differs from mine. I get it. I have actually never been to a 12 step meeting, of any kind, so why would I think … Continue reading Here’s where it gets sticky
Two years ago I asked Blue Eyes to write a letter to the other woman as part of his ninth step. For reasons that have been discussed many times on my blog the letter was not and will never be sent to the other woman. I do believe this letter catapulted my healing in a … Continue reading The letter
It seems to me that ever since I wrote the post about Control and the photo of the other woman, I have felt a weird vibe here on the old blog. First let me get this off my chest. My husband has his own path. He is a recovering sex addict. His recovery includes counseling, … Continue reading Did I forget to say how great my husband is?
For Blue Eyes, part of his addiction is clearly about control. As a child, he was under the strict and harsh command of his narcissistic and abusive mother. She belittled him and chided him and rode his ass day and night. He could never do anything right. Failure was right around the corner for him … Continue reading Control
Things are changing. We march on... The doc did not want me flying. Truthfully though, I think she realized I would push myself too much and wouldn't be keen on sitting around a hotel room in the middle of San Francisco. I called her office on Tuesday afternoon and spoke with her medical assistant. I … Continue reading Grounded
Although my husband is a diagnosed sex addict, he is also a cheater. When I first found out about his cheating, I had no idea he was a sex addict or that such a thing was even real. There were a lot of revelations on his part over those first few days, and an obvious … Continue reading Betrayal doesn’t define me
The end of each year, from Thanksgiving to New Years Day, brings with it a lot of family time for pretty much everyone we know. For the first couple of years of recovery, this family time was fraught with trauma and anxiety. Some people know about Blue Eyes' secret life, but many do not. I … Continue reading Family
I feel like I am caught in a series of cycles. Menopause is one that is getting the better of me. I know I have written about this before, because I have been "going through" menopause since before I commenced writing this blog. I was about 35 years old when we made the decision not … Continue reading Cycles
First, as I typed "all it's cracked up to be" the phrase struck me as quite odd. So, I looked up it's origin. Strange. The Phrase Finder I have asked myself and many others have asked me, if I will ever be able to trust my husband again. I realize there are about a bazillion memes … Continue reading Is trust all it’s cracked up to be?