These are the words that send me to that place. That place where my insides feel like a big festering ulcer, where my head starts to ache and I feel an uneasy clamminess, like I need to purge. "It will never happen again." I was having a great day yesterday. I planned a romantic little … Continue reading “It will never happen again”
married to a sex addict
The ninth step
I am neither scholarly, nor a particular fan, but I am finding Dante's Inferno keeps coming to mind when I think about Blue Eyes' ninth step, which he presented to me in Ms. Honey's office, last Thursday. He was thirty five years old when he began his journey through hell, Dante that is. Mid way through … Continue reading The ninth step
And then, the rain
We just experienced back to back to back days of sunshine and warmth. Spring in the Pacific Northwest is predictably unpredictable. During the sunny dry days, we walked, we soaked it in, we had a picnic, we ate outside, we visited our beach property. Blue Eyes begged me every day to go for rides in his … Continue reading And then, the rain
Sunshine
I found myself in a puddle of tears this morning, and so here I am. I could call a friend, but what would they really be able to do other than listen and try and talk me through the sadness. The sadness just is sometimes. Every day I wake up and hope things will be just a little better … Continue reading Sunshine
Insight and healing
I really thought this husband's words regarding the affect his cheating has had on his family, was worth a reblog.
Lost identity
In the shower this morning I realized I am having an identity crisis. I have written so much here on my blog. I have spilled out who I am, what has happened to me both before and after I found out about my husband's secret life, how I feel about addiction, how I feel about … Continue reading Lost identity
The power of positive energy
I think it is a bit ironic that I am using this title, or even talking about the power of positive energy. I am a realistic person, with a touch of optimism thrown in. I am not all puppy dogs (although I do totally love puppy dogs), and unicorns and rainbows (background on blog title), … Continue reading The power of positive energy
Hashtag, The Struggle Is Real
I don't know what it is, but I love this crazy saying, hashtag thingy, whatever. The Struggle Is Real. Maybe it is because when people use the hashtag, it is usually in conjunction with something silly, like #FirstWorldProblems, #TheStruggleIsReal, I just ate three boxes of Girl Scout cookies for lunch, type of thing. The other … Continue reading Hashtag, The Struggle Is Real
The new normal
Well, it's been a while. We returned a couple days ago from an 11-day trip to New York, New Jersey, and Atlanta, mostly for business. If not for the fact that Blue Eyes caught a bad cold and was sick as a dog the entire trip, and I mean he came down with it ON the … Continue reading The new normal
Plan, revised.
I was actually working diligently on something else, but decided to come here to vent. I'm not traumatized, I'm not even upset. Just, well, I guess, exasperated? I want to blow off a little steam. Blue Eyes had therapy this morning. He called me post therapy to ask if he could bring me home some lunch. … Continue reading Plan, revised.
try not to cry on my rainbow 