One of my all time favorite photos of my baby, The Peacemaker (Sammy). It just happens to be with the mother-in-law. Quite a pair! Today is my mother-in-law’s 81st birthday. This would be the woman who birthed and raised my incredibly dysfunctional husband. I met her 36 1/2 years ago. She was 44 years old, … Continue reading Be kind
in-laws
Purging
Since Blue Eyes reconnected with his parents in December, I have not had any contact with them other than the one dinner in Los Angeles. This is a good thing for me. Blue Eyes tells me they are quite often these days sending him messages asking about Portland. They express disgust with what is theoretically … Continue reading Purging
Just another love story. Part thirteen: California and a wedding
I was now a college graduate and ready to face a new adventure: my first real job. Oh, I had had an actual full time job before, but now I felt like an honest to goodness adult. I was 25 years-old. The job I would garner post university diploma actually initially held far less responsibility than … Continue reading Just another love story. Part thirteen: California and a wedding
The boy we left behind
After Blue Eyes' brother passed, there was a little 15 month old boy left behind. Blue Eyes spent as much time with that boy as he possibly could, it was good for both of them. Blue Eyes helping to fill an empty void in the little boy's life, the stark absence of a father he barely got … Continue reading The boy we left behind
The phone call that changed everything
As I started typing this entry, I realized the title might insinuate I am going to talk about that dreaded phone call from the other woman. Well, I'm not going to talk about her or that phone call because I have already talked enough about it. I started this blog with it, and she doesn't … Continue reading The phone call that changed everything
On letting go, part two
While enjoying a nice respite from the shenanigans of the sister, back in early 2005, the heat was picking up in terms of Blue Eyes' parents and his brother. The brother had started in earnest on his mission to destroy any reasonable relationship Blue Eyes had with the parents. From the beginning of time, mil had … Continue reading On letting go, part two
On letting go, part one
I am taking a break from my travel blogging to get something off my chest. I am hoping that writing this out will help me release some of the feelings that threaten to hold me back, push me down, engulf me.... feelings that haunt me and make me question the validity of my choices. Everywhere I … Continue reading On letting go, part one
Everybody hurts… sometimes
Tomorrow is the five year anniversary of the day Blue Eyes' brother took his own life. Uncle D (as I will call him) was 43 years old. He was married to a young woman he had brought over from China for the purpose of making her his wife. Before hearing the story of how they met by Uncle … Continue reading Everybody hurts… sometimes
Joy will burn out the pain.
Journal Entry: May 27, 2014 At the very top of my list of things that give me joy, are my children. Without hesitation, they are the best gifts I have ever been given. I just returned from my older son's college graduation. He will be called The Pragmatist. In the end, The Pragmatist not only … Continue reading Joy will burn out the pain.
Another one bites the dust
Journal Entry: May 20, 2014 Part of our plan after leaving Los Angeles last week was to meet with both my husband’s therapist (here forward called The Quack) and my local therapist, as a couple, to discuss how best to handle our son’s graduation, and our interactions with the in-laws. I honestly never wanted to … Continue reading Another one bites the dust
try not to cry on my rainbow 