Oh, I know I am, a control freak. I am also obsessive compulsive. I won't go into the details, because they are not all that pretty, but I am. Although I think control freak has a pretty negative connotation in our world, I also think my personality has served me well in the healing process. Blue Eyes' … Continue reading I’m a control freak
married to a sex addict
We know it’s not our fault
The very last thing I did before the appraisal person arrived at our house last week, was make one last run through of The Peacemaker's bedroom and make his bed the way it was intended to be made. He was grumbling upstairs about where was he supposed to go while the appraiser was here. The appraisal … Continue reading We know it’s not our fault
Who knows the truth
After Blue Eyes' disclosures of his secret life and subsequent diagnosis as a sex addict, I kinda wanted everyone to know the truth. I'm not exactly sure why. Eventually I know I wanted people to understand sex addiction. I want it brought out of the darkness and into the light so people will know they … Continue reading Who knows the truth
Just a few tear drops
So, enough about sex addiction... just kidding. What would my life be like without sex addiction? I wouldn't even have this freakin' blog. We had an amazing anniversary trip to the coast last weekend. It was relaxing and invigorating and on the morning after our anniversary, we even went into our new beach house great … Continue reading Just a few tear drops
And while I’m on the topic…
Looking for something else, I came across this approximately five year old Newsweek article regarding sex addiction, which I had seen oh so many months ago. The Sex Addiction Epidemic In re-reading through the article, I had an "aha" moment. Honestly, in the case of me and Blue Eyes, post discovery mid January 2014, I … Continue reading And while I’m on the topic…
“The most important thing is integrity”
If you don't want anyone to find out, don't do it. Sometimes I run across new and informative articles on sex addiction, hopefully as unbiased and with the least amount of judgment and hate as possible. The Fix is a great resource for articles written by and about real people dealing with addiction and recovery. I … Continue reading “The most important thing is integrity”
Just another love story. Part seventeen: the early years, with children
If you have been reading my blog, specifically these entries about our history, you know that I was living a certain reality, loving life, hating my in-laws, married with a new baby, struggling to make ends meet, but you also know the bigger picture, and the reality that my husband was living a very different version of … Continue reading Just another love story. Part seventeen: the early years, with children
I keep writing
I keep writing on my blog because I still love to write, it still helps me metabolize my feelings, and you guys are still out there. There are new betrayed spouses and spouses of sex addicts arriving at a daily pace. It makes me sad, but I also realize there is a need for people to … Continue reading I keep writing
Trauma is a bitch
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2X0Zv7kfwU0 I listened to the studio version of this song... "I Don't Wanna Love Somebody Else" by A Great Big World so many times post discovery day I thought I would just die right then and there, listening to that song, crying out those words. Wherever I was, in my office, in my closet, in … Continue reading Trauma is a bitch
Crazy making
I have been sick for the past few days. Not horrible sick, mainly worn down, not sleeping enough, mild fever, sinus headache that won't go away... There's a lot going on at our house. We have recently repaired a major leak on our lower level (aka, the basement), which created a ton of dust (I … Continue reading Crazy making
try not to cry on my rainbow 