I have read a couple betrayed spouse posts recently, as well as an article or two, on the subject of forgiveness. I have also heard the phrase, "I will never forgive him," quite a few times. I am pretty specifically focusing on betrayed spouses forgiving their cheating spouses. Although I have mentioned forgiveness a few times on my … Continue reading I will never tell him I forgive him
healing
Seeking happiness
Even after all I have shared here, I consider this post to be one of the most difficult to write. This blog entry is being prompted by current happenings in our little family, and also by blogs and other articles I have read over the past two years, some as recently as yesterday. Our younger son … Continue reading Seeking happiness
Amends, part two
December 3, 2015 Later that evening... I knew I was going to do what I did, I just really really wished Blue Eyes had taken our discussion in the morning and done more with it. I wish it had mattered enough for him, that he had taken a good look at that step eight amends … Continue reading Amends, part two
Amends, part one
December 3, 2015 And just when you think he gets it... Blue Eyes is working his step nine: Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others. (sa.org) Step eight was making the list (I always thought step eight was the making amends step), but step nine … Continue reading Amends, part one
Sunday mornings
Prior to d-day, Sunday mornings weren't really anything special. Like any other day, I got up when I felt like it, and Blue Eyes got up when he felt like it. When the kids were younger they had religious school on Sunday mornings, so one or both of us was up reasonably early to get … Continue reading Sunday mornings
Revisiting my story
The story in my head plays out. I am a happily married 50-year old woman with two amazing and mostly grown sons. My husband and I have been best friends and partners for 30 years. We share everything. We are passionate, loving, kind, and show each other mutual respect, until I realize, one of us … Continue reading Revisiting my story
Just getting by
We're in Tokyo. Me, Blue Eyes, our two boys, and my parents, all here for the Princesse's first birthday. I'm pretty sure my brother (GQ) and his wife are thrilled we have all come here for this great occasion as they are paranoid about taking their little girl on a plane. They're not so much … Continue reading Just getting by
I hope you dance
I spent about a half hour yesterday with a lovely young woman. She's so young in fact that she is younger than my younger son. Her life experiences are minimal. She knows about Blue Eyes and our situation. She knows he is a sex addict and she is so sweet and understanding and compassionate towards … Continue reading I hope you dance
The boy we left behind
After Blue Eyes' brother passed, there was a little 15 month old boy left behind. Blue Eyes spent as much time with that boy as he possibly could, it was good for both of them. Blue Eyes helping to fill an empty void in the little boy's life, the stark absence of a father he barely got … Continue reading The boy we left behind
Happy Blogiversary
On October 3, 2015 my blog turned one year old. I have now published 247 posts and received thousands of views and comments. I never could have imagined the emotions that would surround me writing a mostly anonymous blog about my husband's infidelity. At the time I started the blog, my story was nearly 10 … Continue reading Happy Blogiversary
try not to cry on my rainbow 