My sister was talking about me. This would be the sister who shared the same divorced parents, the same childhood experiences, the same trauma. Despite her mental illness, or maybe because of it, she is sharp as a tack. She's insightful, and intuitive, and I know she looks up to me. I'm her big sister, … Continue reading They’re talking about me
trauma
I’m that girl
The good girl. The designated driver. The one who looks around for who might have dropped that $20 bill in the mall parking lot and then turns it in to the security desk. I'm the one who got straight A's, always. The teacher's pet. The good friend, never the mean girl. I'm the one who … Continue reading I’m that girl
What to do with me…
This morning a 20-something hazmat clean up crew guy tells me there is no way he believes I am over 50 years old. Thank you kind young man, you made my day. But it didn't last long. And the fact that a hazmat crew is at my house hits me like a ton of bricks. … Continue reading What to do with me…
And the hits just keep coming
K-9 unit threatening to send in the German Shepherd if the intruder didn’t get down on his knees and put his hands behind his back. The officer yells: “he will bite you!” It worked. And the hits just keep coming. I’m back here in my comfort zone, hiding a bit from the real world. Something … Continue reading And the hits just keep coming
Triggered
This past week I finished watching the television series called The Fall (2013-2016). I watched it all the way through over a few weeks time. It is dark, and intense. The story of a serial killer (Jamie Dornan) in Belfast, Ireland, and the detective (Gillian Anderson) brought in to track him down. It was a … Continue reading Triggered
My identity
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sIaT8Jl2zpI It's no secret that I am not a religious person. My spirituality comes from within. My strength comes from knowing I am a good person. It's also no secret that I listen to Top 40 music. I have a huge playlist on my iTunes that crosses every genre, but I never remember to set … Continue reading My identity
Will I be okay
On our recent business trip back east, we stayed at a hotel in Boston for four nights. When you get off the elevator of the 14th floor of this hotel, there is a little grouping of paintings, with this quote in the middle: After a few arrivals to our floor, and Blue Eyes looking at … Continue reading Will I be okay
Anxiety abroad
I am currently in Japan. Blue Eyes is super busy with work while I get to enjoy some leisure and family time. We're celebrating my Mom's 75th and my niece's (The Princess) 4th birthday here in Tokyo. My baby brother (GQ) has lived in Tokyo for 24+ years now and I'm glad we have business … Continue reading Anxiety abroad
Beautiful trauma
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EBt_88nxG4c I have mentioned P!NK a few times on my blog... okay, a lot of times on my blog. I love her, I really do. I have cried to her songs, I have laughed to her songs, and mostly I have exercised to her songs. She's special. I know she's been through a lot … Continue reading Beautiful trauma
Cycles
I feel like I am caught in a series of cycles. Menopause is one that is getting the better of me. I know I have written about this before, because I have been "going through" menopause since before I commenced writing this blog. I was about 35 years old when we made the decision not … Continue reading Cycles
try not to cry on my rainbow 